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Identity Check

Chapter 16

 

Phil was kind of annoying Patrick.

Since they both returned to work on the Tuesday Phil hadn't mentioned anything about the weekend. Patrick wanted him to ask, so he could say "I sent him away." Okay, it had only been last night, as the holiday weekend finally ended, that he'd told Simon they couldn't see each other again. That it was just the weekend. But he'd done it. He'd sent him away.

And Phil was acting like nothing happened at all.

But despite the annoying, Patrick still wanted to figure out a way to make it up to Phil for dropping him for the weekend. Maybe Phil was sulking about that? No, he wasn't that petty. It could just be embarrassment, Patrick guessed. Of course it wasn't only Phil he had to make things up to. David too, yet without ever letting him find out Patrick had anything to make up for.

How the hell had his life become so complicated in the space of one weekend?

David sent him a text message that afternoon.

Back home. See you tonight?

Working @ circle @ 9, Patrick texted back. Can I come round early?

That suited David, so Patrick sat thinking of a possible plan for the evening. Leave work and go straight to David's. Get brains shagged out till seven-thirty. Get home by eight. Change and get back out again for eight-thirty. That should get him to the Circle for nine. Yep, that schedule worked for him.

It just barely worked. It was almost eight when he left David's flat, David reluctant to let him go, encouraging him to call in sick. But Patrick insisted he couldn't let Ray down and tore himself away after a long, hard kiss at the door, with David in his boxer shorts and bathrobe.

He hadn't even reached the outside door of the building, when his mobile rang. David. He grinned.

"Are you missing me already?"

"Oh yeah," David moaned. "I thought the damn weekend would never end. Next time I'm smuggling you away on the trip with me."

"If you've got a big enough suitcase, I'm pretty flexible."

"Don't I know it? Right, I'm going to go get ready. See you later."

"Later?"

"At the Circle."

Patrick laughed, surprised. He closed the outside door of the building behind him, making sure it locked. "But I'm working."

"And I just love to watch you work it, baby."

*

Patrick ran into the dancer's dressing room at nearly nine-twenty and threw his jacket at the coat rack. Another dancer, Andy, sat there drinking water and reading a magazine. He grinned at Patrick.

"Relax. Ray isn't here. He isn't back from Birmingham until tomorrow."

"Birmingham?" Patrick said, not understanding that. He stood in front of a mirror and combed his hair, trying to compose himself. After running here from the Metro station he looked rather windswept and flushed. "Why is he in Birmingham?"

"What, you missed the drama on Friday?" Andy stood up and joined him beside the mirror, checking his own hair and smearing some glittery stuff across his cheekbones. "You know that barman, Jeff? The one with the nice shoulders? He had a meltdown. His grandmother died and his parents told him he wasn't welcome at the funeral."

"That's horrible."

"I know, gits or what?" He offered the tube of glitter to Patrick, who shook his head. He'd tried that before and spent the rest of the night with his hair continually ending up stuck to his face. "So he got himself in a right state," Andy went on. "He was in the office talking to Ray for hours."

"On Friday night?"

Oh fuck. Jeff, the barman with the nice shoulders, had blond hair. He'd been the one in there behind Ray's closed door. In there having a personal crisis. Not sucking Ray's cock. Oh fuck. Fuck.

"Yeah, Friday. So Ray went down to Birmingham with him for the funeral - that was today. If anyone wants to argue with Ray they're a braver man than me." Andy laughed. "Great guy, Ray, isn't he? Always stands up for his boys."

"What? Yeah, Ray is a great guy."

Patrick on the other hand was a total bastard, instantly believing the worst. And thinking that gave him permission to do the worst too.

"You okay?" Andy said, giving him a concerned glance in the mirror.

"Oh... yeah, just, um, tired."

"Have a cup of coffee before you go on, mate. See you out there."

Andy headed out and Patrick sank into a chair and dropped his head in his hands.

Fuck.

*

By the time he did go out there and climb onto his platform, David had arrived. He took a seat at the edge of the dance floor and watched Patrick. Patrick watched him back, dancing just for him.

He was David's dancing boy. David's, not Simon's. He still had a lot of amends to make to David. But he would do that. He'd been weak, but he'd found some strength too. Enough strength to send Simon away and tell him not to call again.

Now he just had to stay strong.

On his break he grabbed a bottle of water and joined David.

"Enjoying the show?"

"Very much. I could watch you all night."

"Mmm, it's pretty sexy when every time I turn around there you are undressing me with your eyes."

David put a hand on Patrick's knee and ran it up the inside of his thigh. "My hands are really jealous of my eyes." He leaned in to kiss Patrick's neck and ear.

That felt good, but made Patrick suddenly conscious of the people watching them. He was on the job here and most of these guys didn't realise David was his boyfriend. Best not to make them think he was up for face sucking with any random punter.

"Hey, David, you ever seen backstage around here?"

"Why would I want to?" David asked, his voice muffled against Patrick's neck.

"Come on," Patrick said, pulling away. "It's an old theatre. It's got all kinds of interesting nooks and crannies."

"So have you."

God, that wicked grin, almost exactly like Simon's. Don't think about Simon.

"Come on." Patrick stood up. "My break will be over soon."

"So I'll have to go back to watching you writhe sensually on a platform? Oh dear, oh dear." Nevertheless, he stood and allowed Patrick to lead him through the staff only door.

A quick tour followed and Patrick knew David was only feigning some interest in the staff break room and dressing rooms. He only perked up when Patrick opened the door of a small storage room, turning on the light.

"Oh, nothing much in here," Patrick said. "Party supplies. Old furniture." He was about to step back out, but David closed the door behind them.

"I think I like this room the best."

Patrick grinned and came into his arms, started kissing him. He reached out blindly for the light switch and turned the light off. The door had a glass panel over the top of it, and a light in here might draw attention. He should get back to work, his break was over and he'd been late to start with. But how could he resist David?

"I've been hard for an hour watching you," David said, taking took Patrick's hand and pressing it to the bulge in his crotch.

Patrick chuckled. "Going to have to hold onto it for at least another hour."

"Not possible, sweet thing. Want those pretty lips wrapped around it right now."

"I'm at work, I can't."

"Only take a couple of minutes, I'm ready to pop." David laughed. "You get me just that hot. Come on, got the weekend to make up for."

Fear swamped Patrick for a second, until he realised David only meant the lost time they could have been together. He hoped his face hadn't given him away, hoped the dimness hid his momentary alarm. David didn't seem to notice anything amiss. He put his hands on Patrick's shoulders and pushed him down. Patrick didn't resist the pressure and dropped to his knees, glad the room had a carpet, albeit made up of scratchy old industrial carpet tiles. The glass panel gave him enough light to find David's fly and he quickly undid it and freed David's cock.

"Nearly put my eye out," he joked, but David was too far gone for jokes now.

"Do it," he moaned.

Patrick found a condom in his pocket and rolled it on. At once David pulled Patrick's head forward, his hands uncharacteristically rough. Patrick took his cock in willingly, but had to pull back so as not to gag on it, when David pulled him too far.

"Sorry," David groaned out. "Sorry. Just need you... please." He stopped pulling, though his hands stayed on Patrick's head, as if afraid he'd pull away entirely and stop.

Patrick had no intention of stopping. David deserved this. Deserved to have Patrick on his knees, looking for forgiveness. A supplicant, apologising with his mouth and yet not with words. I'm sorry, he said over and over in his mind. Accept this as my apology, even if you never know that's what it is.

Closer. He went down further on David, wanting to give him the ultimate, the best. Simon had taught him what he'd later learnt to call 'deep throat'. It still scared him a bit when he tried it and so far he hadn't done it with David, even when cosy and relaxed on a nice bed. Yet now, here, on his knees, in a dusty storage room, giving David quickie, he suddenly felt bold enough to try it.

He relaxed the muscles he needed to, let the cock enter his throat and David gave a sharp cry of pleasure. He'd come quickly now, Patrick knew, so he wouldn't have to do this for long. But it wasn't too scary. Maybe he was getting used to it. David lasted only a few more seconds, before he climaxed, hands gripping Patrick's hair, guttural moans escaping him. When his body abruptly relaxed, hands falling away, Patrick pulled back carefully and dealt with the condom.

"Fuck!" David gasped and to Patrick's surprise, slid down the wall to sit on the floor, panting, Patrick kneeling between his legs. "Fucking hell, Patrick, I didn't know you could do that. That was fucking intense."

"I'm still kind of nervous of that. It's scary, but I wanted to, for you."

David smiled and reached out to touch Patrick's arm. "Thank you. And thank you for trusting me."

Patrick nodded. Yes. Trust. You only did that with someone who you trusted not to push you. He trusted David completely. How did he get this lucky?

"God, Patrick, I am a lucky man to have found you."

Startled at the reflection of his own thoughts, Patrick shook his head. "I'm the lucky one! I don't deserve a guy like you."

"Pat, a boy who can give a blow job that good deserves any man in the world."

He pulled Patrick forward gently and they kissed. When they parted, too soon, they stayed close, foreheads almost touching, eyes locked.

"I love you, David."

It came out as a whisper. Frightened to say it, frightened of how strong and true it felt in him. He bit his lip, fearing David's reaction. Fearing he'd made a fool of himself and gone too far. But David smiled, his eyes softened and he leaned in, arms around Patrick's neck, their lips almost touching as he answered.

"I love you too, sweet thing."

 

 

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© E Charles 2009